Choices
by RC Mason
Summary: "I've already chosen," he whispered. "But this woman must also choose me." An exploration into this beautiful scene and the complex relationship between Jake Sully and Neytiri. One-shot. *Spoilers*


**Choices: An Avatar Fanfic**

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**Disclaimers:**

**1. This fanfic contains spoilers. Read at your own peril.**

**2. I do not own _Avatar_. It solely belongs to the legendary James Cameron.**

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"_Oel ngati kame, oe 'ite. Slä, ngal ngati kame srak?"_

_I See you, my daughter. But do you See yourself?_

It was a question asked long ago, when Neytiri was but an _'evengé_, a child trembling in her father's arms. She had buried her head deep into his protective embrace, trying to seek a place where the darkness could not penetrate, could not threaten to smother her with everything it represented. The unknown, the fear, and the gleaming golden eyes of the Viperwolves.

It was the uncertainty that Neytiri hated the most. The not knowing of what lurked in the darkness and what she should do about it. For the burden of being a princess and the future Tsahik of the Omaticaya clan rested heavily on the young Na'vi's shoulders, and though she bore it with conviction and pride, she recognised the overwhelming importance that her future decisions would have for the welfare of her People. She needed to learn fast and well about the ways of the Omaticaya and Eywa, the Great Mother, to be a worthy leader of her clan.

Yet, there was only so much that could be taught. An individual's wisdom was unavoidably finite. So what to do when it ran out, or something happened that had never happened before? 'Instinct' was an obvious answer, but it was one that Neytiri disliked. Where did this instinct come from, how could she be certain of its – or more appropriately, _her _– reliability? Was it based on mere fickle emotion, or something more, something greater and more profound that transcended this world?

At her father's gentle encouragement, Neytiri reluctantly opened her screwed-shut eyes. The darkness loomed at her, more sinister than ever. She was ready to squeeze her eyes shut again, but something caught her attention. She let out an unintended gasp.

For amidst the darkness and against the drowning blackness, the _Atokirina_, seeds of the Tree of Souls, shone like silver raindrops as they danced daintily across the night sky.

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_The air tonight is filled with them Atokirina_, Neytiri mused as she watched the initiation ceremony of Jake Sully, the warrior dreamwalker.

In fact, she realised with a small sheepish smile on her lips, it was the same _Atokirina_ that had rested on the poisoned tip of her arrow as she prepared to kill him, who was a stranger to her then. She rested a hand to her chest. He was definitely not a stranger to her now.

Neytiri muttered a silent but heartfelt prayer to Eywa for giving her a sign to stop what could have been Neytiri's most fateful error. Had she not acted like one of the Sky People then, intent on destroying what they do not understand? Like how they could not See the beautiful mystery that is Eywa and all Her creation, Neytiri could not See the lost dreamwalker and feared him for the unknown that he had represented.

Fear later turned to resentment as her mother, the ever-wise Mo'at, made her teach this baby-like Jake Sully the ways of her People. She had assumed that his mind was closed like the rest of the dreamwalkers and mentally braced herself for a level of progress and pain similar to that if she were to repeatedly bang her head against Hometree.

Hence, it was pleasant surprise to discover that his initial stupidity at attracting the Viperwolves with fire was not a usual characteristic of his, and that his bravery could only be matched by his determination to learn. Granted Neytiri had not intended for his first word to be _skxawng_, meaning 'moron,' but she supposed he could not have helped _but_ to have learnt it because he kept on provoking her to use it in the early days. She was thankful that, despite the proliferation in her language use, she had not heard Jake use that word on anybody else in the clan.

But she would never call him a _skxawng_ again, not after the taming of his _ikran_. It was an incredible though nerve-wracking moment as she watched him wrestle with the flying beast - a particularly large and fine specimen - on the treacherous cliffs of the Hallelujah Mountains. Her heart froze when the _ikran_ flung him over the edge of the floating mountain, certain that he had plunged to the infinite depths below. Tsu'Tey's mocking laughter and glee at the fate of Jake Sully left a hollow, ringing sound in her ears and she tried to block it out, contemplating whether Tsu'Tey would find it as funny if her _ikran_ was to oh-so-accidentally knock him off the edge too. But no, Jake has re-surfaced and leapt back onto the _ikran_, struggling with it for a moment before he made _Tsahaylu_ with it, connecting his queue with that of the _ikran._

Her pride of him then as her student was only surpassed by the pride of him now as he underwent the ceremony. She watched as her mother led the traditional hymns, echoed by a chorus from the clan that reverberated into the night. Her throat constricted with emotion. The Omaticaya has accepted him. He had become One of the People.

Neytiri beamed at the scene of the intertwining arms that formed a symbolic and spiritual network that connected each Omaticaya to every other. Jake would make a great Omaticaya warrior, Neytiri was certain of this.

After all, Jake's skill at archery was fast exceeding the other warriors' in the clan, with the ability to match that of Tsu'Tey. This was despite his disadvantage in being previously trained in the bows of the Sky People – 'guns' as they called them – that required only pointing and no skill in drawing the bowstring and gauging both the strength and direction of the shot. These guns were loud and wasteful. They left behind shells and cartridges that littered the ground where the killing had been made, as if the death itself had not been great enough of a tragedy to Eywa.

Neytiri remembered how close she was to Jake as she helped him reposition his body to better aim with the bow. She remembered the warmth of his skin, the hard, wired muscles that tensed underneath it, and the alien yet alluring smell that surrounded him. She had to force herself to take a step back away from him, only to realise the intensity of Jake's gaze as his gold but Sky-People-shaped eyes bore into her. It left her hot and flustered – she did not, or perhaps did not want to, understand the meaning of it. Was he aware of the mesmerizing influence that he held over her? Or was it something more …?

It was then, as the ceremony drew to a close, did Neytiri See herself, and most importantly Jake, with a clarity that she had never experienced before. For once in her life, she was not afraid of the unknown, but yearned for it, wanting to embrace it and claim it as hers and hers only.

But he was everything that she could not have.

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She was leading him to the sacred _Utral Aymokriyä__,_ the Tree of Voices that was the second closest tree, after the Tree of Souls, to the Na'vi people's heart. Neytiri smiled softly at the way that Jake would stop and stare at everything with mouth slightly agape, like a child being led through a wonderland. However, his child-like quality was no longer a reflection of ignorance, but rather his innocence. He had a pure heart that Neytiri loved him for above all – and at that thought, her smile dropped. This was going to be more painful than she thought, this last stage in the initiation ceremony. Neytiri did not want to do it, but her mother had considered it fitting as she had been Jake's mentor for the last few months, and one did not argue with Tsahiks, let alone mothers.

She stopped as they approached the base of the Tree and turned to face him, almost forgetting to look happy not sad on this occasion. Neytiri opened her mouth to begin the ritual instructions.

"You are an Omaticaya now. You may make your bow from the wood of Hometree …" She paused as she recalled the next lines. This would hurt. She turned her back to him and tried to keep her voice steady and nonchalant.

"And you may choose a woman."

_I am a woman_, the more hopeful and annoying part of her noted. Neytiri mentally scolded this little voice, reminding it that she could not belong to Jake. She was betrothed to Tsu'Tey after all, though her heart felt nothing for him, as well as the princess of the Omaticaya. She needed to think and act in the best interests of her People, not out of her own desires. Any relations with Jake would not only anger and humiliate Tsu'Tey, causing strife within the clan, but it would leave them vulnerable to external attack. Whilst she trusted Jake, she was wary of the Sky People whom he came from and it would dangerous for them to have a link with such a high-ranking Omaticaya.

An _Atokirina_ floated down towards her and Neytiri softly cupped it in her hands. Its silken touch gave her strength and she continued.

"We have many fine women."

_Better to give the other girls a chance_, Neytiri thought grimly. She saw how Jake attracted the stares of many of them; he could be considered handsome by Na'vi standards with his tall, lean figure and windswept dark hair. Any one of them would have the potential to make Jake happy. In fact, who was to say that Jake did not fancy the other women? A black wave of despair swept over Neytiri, ashamed of her arrogance. Who was she to presume that Jake would have chosen her? All she ever did was insult him and whack him over the head. She was not soft and girly like Ninaht, whose sweet, melodious voice had captured the hearts of many men. Neytiri remembered the way that Jake laughed, throwing his head back in a carefree way, as Ninaht sung a cheeky song for him before the initiation ceremony.

At Jake's silence, she steeled her resolve and decided to prompt him, to show her support for their relationship.

"Ninaht is the best singer."

There, she had said it. _Happy now?_ she glared at the _Atokirina, _but it would not budge from her hands.

Jake's voice was rough as he answered back from behind her.

"Well, I don't want Ninette."

A small smile escaped Neytiri's lips as she realised that Jake did not even remember Ninaht's name, in spite of all her beautiful singing.

_Perhaps there is some hope after all. _

At this thought, the _Atokirina_ took flight and floated away.

_But I shouldn't cling to hope. It must be someone else._

Nevertheless, Neytiri could not help but to softly blow at the drifting _Atokirina_, giving it an extra push into the night sky, her hope soaring with it.

"Pidal is a good hunter."

At this, Neytiri turned back to face Jake, her eyes scrutinising him. She had to get this recommendation out of the way. Pidal was perhaps one of the most beautiful women in the Omaticaya clan. Her eyes were large and golden, and her legs were long and toned from the hunting that she always took part in. Pidal had accompanied them on Jake's first hunting trip and Neytiri had disliked the way that Pidal had showed off in front of Jake. It had annoyed her for the rest of the day … and perhaps a whole week later, though Neytiri would never admit it.

"Yeah, she is a good hunter," Jake said slowly and Neytiri felt her heart drop.

She could not speak until he had confirmed her fears; again she was balancing on the fine tip of uncertainty and the unknown. In the darkness of her mind, she saw images of Jake smiling and happy with Pidal by his side, and their children running around them, chortling with laughter. A stab of jealousy broke through her and immediately, she felt ashamed for denying Pidal and Jake their happiness.

Neytiri stared at Jake, her eyes wide and unblinking, and her heart thudding painfully in her chest.

"I've already chosen," he whispered, his eyes not quite meeting hers.

The ambiguity of this statement hung in the air, then …

"But the woman must also choose me."

Jake's gaze was on her now, burning and intense. Not unlike the one that she had experienced so many months ago when she was teaching Jake how to use a bow and arrow. It fell like rays of the sun hitting her face and Neytiri broke into a smile of pure joy as she comprehended the significance of his words. Her smile lit the beauty of her face and she felt him stagger slightly under her loveliness. It was all too surreal, but she could not deny it – the attraction was like gravity that bound her to Jake and him to her. Was it selfish though? Should she accept his offer and pursue it to the end of time as all Na'vi do?

_Choices … _

The image of the floating _Atokirina _flashed in her mind. Eywa had sent a sign, no her _blessing_, for them to be together. The Tree of Voices was alive and the spirits that inhabited it began to whisper softly but urgently in the breeze. The gentle murmurs reaffirmed Eywa's will, reassuring Neytiri that this was meant to be. After all, her heart had known the answer all along.

Like gravity, their attraction was natural and would set the path of things to follow.

She brought her eyes to meet Jake's and had to smile at the anxious expression on his face. She had never seen him this apprehensive before, not even when he was surrounded by a pack of Viperwolves in the dead of the night.

Perhaps she had stayed silent for too long becaused he swallowed and made a move to open his mouth, his eyes dimming as his heart began to accept an inevitable heartbreak.

But she stopped him by a look from her own eyes, a look that only an Omaticaya princess could muster. It was message from her heart to his of the emotion that they both shared, a desire that overwhelmed them both and anticipated her next words.

"She already has."

One long stare. A frozen moment in time. Then, an alien feeling.

The feeling of Jake's lips on hers. Not alien because it was unnatural, but because it was new to her. So devastatingly wondrous that she wanted more.

They sank to the ground, drowning in the ecstasy of each other...

Afterwards, when it was done and she was sitting on his lap, placing soft kisses on his slightly damp forehead, she breathed into his ear.

"I am with you now, Jake. We are mated for life."

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**I have tried to stay true to the dialogue and intentions of _Avatar_, but at the same time tried to flesh out the complexities of the characters during the scene. I am absolutely in love with the relationship between Neytiri and Jake – there is a level of depth, not to mention uniqueness, between them that is just waiting to be explored! **

**Please review and let me know what you think! **

_**Irayo! **_**[Thank you!]  
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**As a sidenote, a complete version of this scene is featured in the Youtube video ****.com/watch?v=HLzYwMjlPEM****. It is the only one that I could find that was in colour and had the actual soundtrack, albeit small screen capture. I used it to help write this fanfic ;)**


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